|
|
|
Mordel's Bar & Grill |
|
  |
» |
| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
Motown Scrapper
Clan Ice Hellions
Galaxy Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2003 00:00
Posts: 2074
Location: United States
|
 Posted: 07-Mar-2005 07:49 Post subject: You Got to Wonder |
  |
|
How do these people survive?
ONE Recently, when I went to McDonald's I saw on the menu that you could have an order of 6, 9 or 12 Chicken McNuggets. I asked for a half dozen nuggets. "We don't have half dozen nuggets," said the teenager at the counter. "You don't?" I replied. "We only have six, nine, or twelve," was the reply. "So I can't order a half dozen nuggets, but I can order six?" "That's right." So I shook my head and ordered six McNuggets.
TWO I was checking out at the local Wal-Mart with just a few items and the lady behind me put her things on the belt close to mine. I picked up one of those "dividers" that they keep by the cash register and placed it between our things so they wouldn't get mixed. After the girl had scanned all of my items, she picked up the "divider", looking it all over for the bar code so she could scan it. Not finding the bar code she said to me, "Do you know how much this is?" I said to her "I've changed my mind, I don't think I'll buy that today." She said "OK," and I paid her for the things and left. She had no clue to what had just happened.
THREE A lady at work was seen putting a credit card into her floppy drive and pulling it out very quickly. When I inquired as to what she was doing, she said she was shopping on the Internet and they kept asking for a credit card number, so she was using the ATM "thingy."
FOUR I recently saw a distraught young lady weeping beside her car. "Do you need some help?" I asked. She replied, "I knew I should have replaced the battery to this remote door unlocker. Now I can't get into my car. Do you think they (pointing to a distant convenience store) would have a battery to fit this?" "Hmmm, I dunno. Do you have an alarm, too?" I asked. "No, just this remote thingy," she answered, handing it and the car keys to me. As I took the key and manually unlocked the door, I replied, "Why don't you drive over there and check about the batteries. It's a long walk."
FIVE Several years ago, we had an Intern who was none too swift. One day she was typing and turned to a secretary and said, "I'm almost out of typing paper. What do I do?" "Just use copier machine paper," the secretary told her. With that, the intern took her last remaining blank piece of paper, put it on the photocopier and proceeded to make five "blank" copies.
SIX I was in a car dealership a while ago, when a large motor home was towed into the garage. The front of the vehicle was in dire need of repair and the whole thing generally looked like an extra in "Twister." I asked the manager what had happened. He told me that the driver had set the "cruise control" and then went in the back to make a sandwich.
SEVEN My neighbor works in the operations department in the central office of a large bank. Employees in the field call him when they have problems with their computers. One night he got a call from a woman in one of the branch banks who had this question: "I've got smoke coming from the back of my terminal. Do you guys have a fire downtown?"
EIGHT Police in Radnor, Pa., interrogated a suspect by placing a metal colander on his head and connecting it with wires to a photocopy machine. The message "He's lying" was placed in the copier, and police pressed the copy button each time they thought the suspect wasn't telling the truth. Believing the "lie detector" was working, the suspect confessed.
NINE A mother calls 911 very worried asking the dispatcher if she needs to take her kid to the emergency room, the kid was eating ants. The dispatcher tells her to give the kid some Benadryl and should be fine. The mother says, I just gave him some ant killer..... Dispatcher: Rush him to emergency!
Life is tough. It's tougher if you're stupid."
_________________
Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have-Rush Limbaugh www.rushlimbaugh.com
Force of nature
Still crazy after all these years
|
|
| Back to top |
  
|
ralgith
Blighted Sun Battalion
1st Company
"Ralgith's Renegades"
Colonel
Joined: 18-Aug-2003 00:00
Posts: 2021
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 07-Mar-2005 08:01 Post subject: RE: You Got to Wonder |
|
|
My God!
Some people's children.
Heh.
Too bad common sense don't grow on trees.
I love the "cruise control = autodrive" one LOL!
_________________
Colonel Ralgith t'Mayasara
Blighted Sun Battalion
1st Company 'Ralgith's Renegades'
|
|
| Back to top |
|
jymset
Scavenger
in pursuit of LosTech
Joined: 05-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 956
Location: Germany
|
| Posted: 07-Mar-2005 08:20 Post subject: RE: You Got to Wonder |
|
|
ROFLMAO!!!!!
Best thing about these is that some actually happened to you!
But come on, surely 6 and 7 were meant to be jokes?
And #9 was awful! But maybe it was meant to happen - how can the spawn of such a woman ever turn out?! Preemtive natural selection....
_________________
"Rear armour is defeatist!" - unknown Kuritan Mechwarrior
The AC5 is a great gun!
On heat, 3025 style:
A Rifleman knows no heat.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Rarich
Federated Suns
Leftenant General
Joined: 05-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 991
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 07-Mar-2005 19:30 Post subject: RE: You Got to Wonder |
|
|
I have seen all of these before, I would not be surprised if they are true. I was a witness to the Half Dozen story. I also Had an 8 year old ask how to dial an old style telephone- the one with the spinning dial, not the push buttons. There are some intersting gaps showing up in education and peoples problem solving abilities.
How many of you remember what a Licorice Pizza is?
How about 'normal' roller skates?
I see similar issues in the casino I work at all the time, people putting 5 CENTs in 5 Dollar slots because they don't really read. Walking away from their purse because the "friend" they met 5 minutes ago said they would watch it. Several other things happen that are scary too.
[ This Message was edited by: Rarich on 2005-03-07 19:33 ]
_________________
Duct tape is like the force. It has a light side & a dark side, and strings also lie under it all.
Life is a sexually transmitted terminal disease.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Oafman
Draconis Combine
Tai-sho
Joined: 18-Nov-2003 00:00
Posts: 1657
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 08-Mar-2005 14:25 Post subject: RE: You Got to Wonder |
|
|
That would be why my wife's favorite phrase for people like these is "stupid sheep"
_________________
Festina Lente!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Wanallo
Federated Suns
Leftenant Colonel
Joined: 02-Jan-2004 00:00
Posts: 671
Location: United Kingdom
|
| Posted: 11-Mar-2005 10:03 Post subject: RE: You Got to Wonder |
|
|
Only yesterday i spent about twenty minutes trying to switch my dvd off. Pressing most of the buttons rather angrily. Nothing was working, i was just about to lose my temper and throw the thing through the window when i realised something.
I pressed stop on my VCR, the VIDEO went off.  
_________________
Constant exposure to dangers will breed contempt for them-Seneca
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
| |
» |
All times are GMT-05:00 |
|
|
You cannot post new topics in this forum
You cannot reply to topics in this forum
You cannot edit your posts in this forum
You cannot delete your posts in this forum
You cannot vote in polls in this forum
You cannot attach files in this forum
You can download files in this forum
|
|
|
|
|
|
