| View previous topic :: View next topic |
| Author |
Message |
Motown Scrapper
Clan Ice Hellions
Galaxy Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2003 00:00
Posts: 2074
Location: United States
|
 Posted: 11-Mar-2005 06:01 Post subject: First Date |
  |
|
This story was on the "Tonight Show" with Jay Leno. Jay went into
the audience to find the most embarrassing first date that a woman
ever had.
The winner described her worst first date experience. There was
absolutely no question as to why her tale took the prize!
Marilyn said it was midwinter... snowing and quite cold... and the
guy had taken her skiing to Lake Arrowhead. It was a day trip, no
overnight. They were strangers, after all, and truly had never met
before.
The outing was fun but relatively uneventful until they were headed
home late that afternoon. They were driving back down the mountain
when she gradually began to realize that she should not have had that
extra latte.
They were about an hour away from anywhere with a rest room and the
middle of nowhere! Her companion suggested she try to hold it,
which she did for a while. Unfortunately, because of the heavy snow
and slow going, there came a point where she told him that he had
better stop and let her pee on the side of the road, or it would
be in the front seat of his car.
They stopped and she quickly crawled out beside the car, yanked her
pants down and started. Unfortunately, in the deep snow she didn't
have good footing, so she let her butt rest against the rear fender
to steady herself. Her companion stood on the side of the car watching for
traffic and indeed was a real gentleman and refrained from peeking.
All she could think about was the relief she felt despite the rather
embarrassing nature of the situation. Upon finishing however, she soon
became aware of another sensation.
As she bent to pull up her pants, the young lady discovered her buttocks
were firmly glued against the car's fender. Thoughts of tongues, pump
handles immediately came to mind as she attempted to free her flesh from
the icy metal. It was quickly apparent that she had a brand new problem
due to the extreme cold.
Horrified by her plight and yet aware of the humor, she answered her
date's concerns about "what was taking so long" with a reply that indeed,
she was "freezing her butt off and needed some assistance!" He came
around the car as she tried to cover herself with her sweater, and then,
as she looked imploringly into his eyes, he burst out laughing. She too,
got the giggles and when they finally managed to compose themselves, they
assessed her dilemma.
Obviously as hysterical as the situation was, they also were faced with a
real problem.
Both agreed it would take something hot to free her chilly cheeks from the
grip of the icy metal! Thinking about what had gotten her into the
predicament
in the first place, both quickly realized that there was only one way to
get
her free so, as she looked the other way, her first time date proceeded to
unzip his pants and pee her butt off the fender.
As for the Tonight Show... she took the prize hands down... or perhaps that
should be "pants down." And you thought your first date was embarrassing!
This gives a whole new meaning to being "pissed off."
Oh, and how did the first date turn out? He became her husband and was
sitting next to her on the Leno show.
_________________
Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have-Rush Limbaugh www.rushlimbaugh.com
Force of nature
Still crazy after all these years
|
|
| Back to top |
  
|
Emmy
Clan Wolf
Star Commander
Joined: 20-Mar-2004 00:00
Posts: 167
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 11-Mar-2005 13:50 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
LOL
Hmm... there may be something about embarrassing first dates that lead to a lasting relationship... I remember the first date I had with my fiance!
I wonder if he remembers it... Well Vagabond?
_________________
"I love deadlines. I especially love the 'whooshing' sound they make as they fly by" ~ Douglass Adams
Happiness is biting your bird back.
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Erenon
Blighted Sun Battalion
2nd Company
"Seraph's Slaughter"
Sergeant
Joined: 04-Jun-2004 00:00
Posts: 976
Location: Singapore
|
| Posted: 11-Mar-2005 18:52 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
UH-oh loaded question..
I cringe when my wife asks me the same....
_________________
"My job is to keep the majority of people in this country alive. That's it. If fifty-one percent eat a meal tomorrow and forty-nine percent don't, I've done my job." - The Beast (AKA The President), Transmetropolitan
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Vagabond
Mercenary
Mr. Referee
Joined: 04-Feb-2002 00:00
Posts: 5793
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 11-Mar-2005 19:18 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
Quote:
|
On 2005-03-11 13:50, Emmy wrote:
LOL
Hmm... there may be something about embarrassing first dates that lead to a lasting relationship... I remember the first date I had with my fiance!
I wonder if he remembers it... Well Vagabond?
|
|
I can't forget it. As many of you know, i RL i am in a wheelchair and have VERY limited walking ability. Well i had even less at that time. Anyway, we went to a new years party and my friends house has stairs into and out of the kitchen. When it was time to leave, I had to walk up 1 set of stairs get in my chair then go down the other. Well fate would have it that as i'm going up the 3rd of 5 steps with my fiancee 5ft behind me watching, my shorts fall off. Now, i am a tall guy at 6'2" and my but was perfectly aligned with her face. Very embarrassing.
_________________
one must work hard to cultivate the mind and body. and one must always cultivate the mind.
//^(^_^)^\\
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Oafman
Draconis Combine
Tai-sho
Joined: 18-Nov-2003 00:00
Posts: 1657
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 11-Mar-2005 19:47 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
how romantic. Standing cheek to cheek......
_________________
Festina Lente!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Motown Scrapper
Clan Ice Hellions
Galaxy Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2003 00:00
Posts: 2074
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 12-Mar-2005 04:45 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
Well chances are she saw something that clinched the deal. 
_________________
Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have-Rush Limbaugh www.rushlimbaugh.com
Force of nature
Still crazy after all these years
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Oafman
Draconis Combine
Tai-sho
Joined: 18-Nov-2003 00:00
Posts: 1657
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 14-Mar-2005 14:15 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
Notice that neither of them are responding.
_________________
Festina Lente!
|
|
| Back to top |
|
ralgith
Blighted Sun Battalion
1st Company
"Ralgith's Renegades"
Colonel
Joined: 18-Aug-2003 00:00
Posts: 2021
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 14-Mar-2005 17:50 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
You guys are horrible!! ROFL!!! and probably right.
_________________
Colonel Ralgith t'Mayasara
Blighted Sun Battalion
1st Company 'Ralgith's Renegades'
|
|
| Back to top |
|
Motown Scrapper
Clan Ice Hellions
Galaxy Commander
Joined: 24-Jul-2003 00:00
Posts: 2074
Location: United States
|
| Posted: 15-Mar-2005 04:30 Post subject: RE: First Date |
|
|
Quote:
|
On 2005-03-14 17:50, ralgith wrote:
You guys are horrible!! ROFL!!! and probably right.
|
|
Well?
_________________
Having more fun than a human being should be allowed to have-Rush Limbaugh www.rushlimbaugh.com
Force of nature
Still crazy after all these years
|
|
| Back to top |
|
|
|
